Some teachers enjoying themselves at last Saturday's Music Club at the London Pub. Students and teachers were singing along to classic songs from the likes of The Black Crowes and Pink Floyd. How Jeff managed to play for so long without forgetting any of the words, I’ll never know.

This Week:

Snooker & Pool Club, Sunday 22nd October – Is anyone interested in a game of pool? Myself (Daniel) and Kel will be meeting at the pool hall around 2pm this Sunday. Sign up at the secretaries office.

Film Club, Wednesday 18th October – James and Chris will be your hosts for the evening from 7:30pm in room 8. Please put your name on the list in the secretaries office if you want to come.


Welcome

A warm welcome to our new teachers, Caroline and Jolene (USA). I’m sure you’ll get to know them better as the weeks go by.

In other news this week: Sean has bought a new pair of underpants. He’s been saving his money for something special. “They’re perfect”, he told me, “made of plastic so I won’t need to wash them.”

A hole was recently discovered in a nudist camp fence, but the Police have assured everyone that they are looking into it.

Paradigm Time

The verb “to sit” .. sit – sat – sat

The verb “to hit” .. hit – hit – hit

What’s wrong with this sentence?
I hat him and his hat fell off.

The Longest Question

Each week I will attempt to write a longer, more ridiculous question than the longest and most ridiculous question in the Callan Method.

If you were walking down the street and you suddenly felt a burning sensation in your left ear and thought a bee had just stung you but it was in fact a small lump of hot cheese that Marcin had just thrown at you, would you stop and say, “Marcin, why did you just throw a small lump of hot cheese at me?” and then call him something unpleasant, or would you ignore it and continue walking as if nothing had happened and proceed to the nearest shop that sold cheese resistant ear protectors and buy a pair, providing you had enough money?

[103 words]

Word of the Day

Palindrome – a word or phrase that is spelt the same way forwards or backwards e.g. ‘Madam’.

Song Lyrics

“If I was a river you would be my ocean” – Tina Arena
A second conditional (present subjunctive) is used in this song.

“I can’t get no satisfaction” – The Rolling Stones
This is a double negative and is grammatically incorrect in English. It should be: “I can’t get any satisfaction.” Grammatical correctness and Rock ‘n Roll, however, have never been the best of friends.

“We don’t need no education!” – Pink Floyd, Another Brick in the Wall.