GLIWICE SPEEDO

The Speed School of English Weekly Newsletter

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Word of the day:

abbreviation

from Latin brevis meaning short (skrót)
e.g. is an abbreviation of exempli gratia from Latin, meaning for example. Some other well-known abbreviations are:

ASAP = As soon as possible
US = United States
SOS = Save Our Souls
Mr = Mister
PC = Personal Computer
CD = Compact Disc

It is very common to use abbreviations without full stops between letters. Text messaging, also known as SMS, makes use of abbreviations:

LOL = laughing out loudly
BTW = by the way


Clubs this week:
Advanced Conversation Club, with Sean and Brian is on Wednesday 23rd, at 7.30pm. Sign up with the secretaries.

This week’s Film Club will be held at the Amok theatre. The film is called The Fountain. If you want to go, meet at the school at 7:45pm.
Snooker & Pool Club is on Sunday at 2pm.
The English Language
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.


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